Men, otherwise known as "Testosterone Based Lifeforms" by a friend of mine... They are great fathers. But, somethings always makes me scratch my head. Take my husband. He watches the kids and generally does a good job. No one is killed, severely injured, poisoned, etc. However, when it comes to noticing what the kids are doing, well, there are times when that's a bit suspect. I blame the TV. Alright him too, because if he didn't turn on the TV he wouldn't be so mesmerized by it and would pay more attention to the kids. The oldest will inevitably put something into his mouth only to hear me ask, "what are you eating?" His father will reply nothing then look and see the kid is chewing something. At which point the race is on. Can we get to the kid before the object is swallowed. In one instance this included a piece of a small Nurf football. Had the kid choked he would have died since the piece was large enough to enter the air ways and get stuck. Fortunately, that didn't happen and I was able to get the piece of Nurf out of his mouth. Apparently my husband didn't know that Nurf anything should not be given to small children. He knows now!
Then there is his idea of clean and mine. His idea of clean is that as long as the dishes aren't in the sink and the pots and pans are put away the kitchen is clean. My idea of clean is as follows: Sink and counter tops are debris free, wiped down and sanitized on a regular basis. The floor is swept and mopped. The dishes are put away, the dishwasher is run when needed (daily with small children) and the refrigerator periodically gone through to throw out all old/rotten food.
So this brings up a sanity issue. As a general rule you dump raw meat juice down the sink. Inevitably it splashes up the sides and occasionally in the process gets onto the counter tops. Well not only is the baby bathed in the kitchen sink (in a baby tub), but the bottles are dried next to the same sink. I find this to be a problem but my husband thinks I'm a "germ-a-phobe". That might be, to a point, but I happen to know all the bad things that like to live in raw meat. If things aren't cleaned prior to other uses they have a tendency to spread. It just so happens that my husband (who cleans nipples every night) likes to do so in the sink that has had the stuff in it that isn't sanitized or washed with hot water & soap prior to this use.
Many an argument/ discussion has taken place about this including presenting a couple magazine articles to back up my position. To which my husband throws up his hands in disgust and states "that's right, I'm an idiot". Not once did I say that, but did I ever want to. Yes I could wash the nipples every night, but damn it it's about time he do something for the kids other than give the older one a bath at night. So now when he washes the nipples he does so in the bowl that I put all the dirty nipples into through out the day. A much more sanitary way of doing business.
If you are ever home during the day with the kid(s) you will notice a few things:
1) You can deal with the incessant whining, crying and nagging the children give you until your spouse comes home. At which point you want nothing more than silence and a conversation with an adult.
2) What bothers you at night will not bother your spouse much if at all. This might have something to do with having to listen to the same thing over and over again all day long. Since your spouse hasn't been at home all during the day, this is all new.
3) Children, like adults get very cranky before bed, when hungry or if they aren't feeling well. Combine any or all those things together and you have a recipe made in hell. That being the case, warn your spouse prior to his/her arrival home. Should this be sprung on them they will be worse than the child. At which point all you want to do is run away and let them deal with it on their own. However this couldn't be a worse idea. Add a crank to a crank. What do you get? Hell on wheels. All they manage to do is piss each other off more and more until one of them snaps. The person who snaps is usually the spouse and then the child won't eat, sleep, or stop crying. Nor will the child want anything to do with the father and therefore be up your ass like it's nobodies business. Not fun!
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Thursday, January 3, 2008
There Are Times When...
There are times when being a parent you wish you could do something to have a little fun with your children but don't dare because you will pay for it after. This has nothing to do with corporal punishment. I'm referring to the times when your children do something and being the sarcastic / cynical person that you are, your first response must be held back. For instance:
When you have the option to either let your child remain sleeping in the car seat or transfer her to her crib, let her sleep in the car seat. Have you ever heard of the saying "let sleeping dogs lie"? Case in point... Murphy's law would dictate that as soon as you move your baby to the crib she will wake up and immediately begin crying and carrying on like the world was coming to an end. Then after 20 minutes of scrambling to figure out what is wrong you determine that she is hungry. You feed her expecting her to go right back to sleep only to have her wide awake and expecting you to hold her, play with her or otherwise keep her occupied for the next few hours.
Children being children will ultimately get into something at some point during the day. That having been said it's expected when your toddler manages to get into the Tupperware drawer and throw the entire contents on the floor. However, when you are taking a shower and leave the children with their father you don't expect to have a knock on the glass from a little person who would like to watch the water fall on you because water is the greatest thing in the world, while holding his father shoe. Once you get the startled, bewildered look off your face, you should not begin to play with the child by throwing water onto the glass. All this does is encourage the child to do this more often and you can't get it to stop with out battle.
Inevitably the poop filled diaper will stink up the babies room if not the whole house.
While dad is changing the poop filled diaper and from the depths of the house you hear "No...Not the pelvic thrusts..." your immediate reaction is to laugh. Knowing that the baby has just lifted his rear end off the table then let it fall back to the, table at least once, while the poopy diaper is still on thus spreading poop out the top of the diaper and all over the changing table. Laughing is definitely not the right reaction. All it does is encourage baby to do this more often and frustrate dad even more. However it is incredibly funny!
When your child is going through the stage where everything is going into his mouth, be sure that you don't laugh when they decide to put something in their mouth. Regardless of how cute or hysterical it is. For instance when the oldest decided to come out scooting (yes, somehow managing hopping on his butt) with a stuffed dog in his mouth by the ear don't laugh. All that did was encourage the act and put more stuff in the mouth.
If you have ever heard that once you have children you will get no peace, well, that's no exaggeration. When I'm at home with the kids and need to go to the bathroom closing the door is not an option. Should I do so the oldest will sit outside the door wailing like a crazy person until I come out. So leaving the door seems the only logical option to save one's eardrums. This only means that the oldest will not only come into the bathroom while I'm on the toilet, but try and get you to play or bring things for you to look at. As you can imagine, it's a little disconcerting to know that you can't even take a dump in peace. Aha yes, separation anxiety, what a lovely stage.
When you have the option to either let your child remain sleeping in the car seat or transfer her to her crib, let her sleep in the car seat. Have you ever heard of the saying "let sleeping dogs lie"? Case in point... Murphy's law would dictate that as soon as you move your baby to the crib she will wake up and immediately begin crying and carrying on like the world was coming to an end. Then after 20 minutes of scrambling to figure out what is wrong you determine that she is hungry. You feed her expecting her to go right back to sleep only to have her wide awake and expecting you to hold her, play with her or otherwise keep her occupied for the next few hours.
Children being children will ultimately get into something at some point during the day. That having been said it's expected when your toddler manages to get into the Tupperware drawer and throw the entire contents on the floor. However, when you are taking a shower and leave the children with their father you don't expect to have a knock on the glass from a little person who would like to watch the water fall on you because water is the greatest thing in the world, while holding his father shoe. Once you get the startled, bewildered look off your face, you should not begin to play with the child by throwing water onto the glass. All this does is encourage the child to do this more often and you can't get it to stop with out battle.
Inevitably the poop filled diaper will stink up the babies room if not the whole house.
While dad is changing the poop filled diaper and from the depths of the house you hear "No...Not the pelvic thrusts..." your immediate reaction is to laugh. Knowing that the baby has just lifted his rear end off the table then let it fall back to the, table at least once, while the poopy diaper is still on thus spreading poop out the top of the diaper and all over the changing table. Laughing is definitely not the right reaction. All it does is encourage baby to do this more often and frustrate dad even more. However it is incredibly funny!
When your child is going through the stage where everything is going into his mouth, be sure that you don't laugh when they decide to put something in their mouth. Regardless of how cute or hysterical it is. For instance when the oldest decided to come out scooting (yes, somehow managing hopping on his butt) with a stuffed dog in his mouth by the ear don't laugh. All that did was encourage the act and put more stuff in the mouth.
If you have ever heard that once you have children you will get no peace, well, that's no exaggeration. When I'm at home with the kids and need to go to the bathroom closing the door is not an option. Should I do so the oldest will sit outside the door wailing like a crazy person until I come out. So leaving the door seems the only logical option to save one's eardrums. This only means that the oldest will not only come into the bathroom while I'm on the toilet, but try and get you to play or bring things for you to look at. As you can imagine, it's a little disconcerting to know that you can't even take a dump in peace. Aha yes, separation anxiety, what a lovely stage.
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
The Sona Pillow
For those of you who have never heard of the Sona Pillow, it was something I read about in Prevention Magazine from their February 2007 issue (I saved the article I read about 3 months ago). It's also called the snore-stopping pillow. It was developed by a Harvard-trained neurologist and it's designed to tilt your head and open your airways while sleeping. Patients studied have shown a reduction in sleep interruptions from 17 to 5. Oh, it's also FDA approved. So I took a look at the website to purchase one for my husband (www.sonapillow.com).
According to the article it sells for $69.99. When I went to the website tonight it states that Brookstone is now their exclusive selling partner. This is apparently due to overwhelming demand. So I clicked on the link to Brookstone and discovered the pillow is not selling for $69.99 but for $129.00. Plus they want an additional $20.00 for the pillowcase. I was so furious that I emailed Brookstone customer service and told them how it was unfair that an article states the price for the pillow is $69.99 and they are selling it for $129.00 plus $20.00 for the pillowcase. The last thing I stated in the email was "Dare I call this false advertising?". Please feel free to contact Brookstone Customer Service at customerservice@brookstone.com.
I'm sure they are not going to care that someone is not happy with the price and is not going to purchase the pillow as a result. It's also a shame that no one reads this blog because if people did Brookstone might pay attention to what the little guys has to say. Alas, I'm just one person who with any luck will receive a response from Brookstone, but I doubt that will happen. Should anything come of the email I sent today, to Brookstone, I'll let you know.
It just so happens that I was checking my email and I received an automatic response from Brookstone Customer Service and they are going to look into my inquiry and will get back to me as quickly as possible.
According to the article it sells for $69.99. When I went to the website tonight it states that Brookstone is now their exclusive selling partner. This is apparently due to overwhelming demand. So I clicked on the link to Brookstone and discovered the pillow is not selling for $69.99 but for $129.00. Plus they want an additional $20.00 for the pillowcase. I was so furious that I emailed Brookstone customer service and told them how it was unfair that an article states the price for the pillow is $69.99 and they are selling it for $129.00 plus $20.00 for the pillowcase. The last thing I stated in the email was "Dare I call this false advertising?". Please feel free to contact Brookstone Customer Service at customerservice@brookstone.com.
I'm sure they are not going to care that someone is not happy with the price and is not going to purchase the pillow as a result. It's also a shame that no one reads this blog because if people did Brookstone might pay attention to what the little guys has to say. Alas, I'm just one person who with any luck will receive a response from Brookstone, but I doubt that will happen. Should anything come of the email I sent today, to Brookstone, I'll let you know.
It just so happens that I was checking my email and I received an automatic response from Brookstone Customer Service and they are going to look into my inquiry and will get back to me as quickly as possible.
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